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Another bullshit.

Maybe it's me. Maybe I just happen to expect too much from other people. Bad, bad thing. Seriously, learning from your mistakes or your past, is not really an easy thing. History would just keep on repeating itself no matter how much you want to stop it. Oh well.

PARANOIA. It sucks the life out of people. It sucked--is sucking (not really sure of the tense yet) the life out of me. Sometimes I feel like my friends (with a few exceptions) aren't really my friends. You know. They're just there, but they don't really give a crap about me. I feel like the world is against me. That every thing that I do, even the littlest of things, is wrong. That with every move that I make, every step that I take, there will always be this pair of eyes staring at me. Okay, this is not my way of saying that I'm soooo popular that people would actually care about what I do or don't do. I'm not being arrogant or anything. It's just that sometimes, I feel like I just exist so that the world would have someone to criticize. And besides, I'm not even popular. I'm a semi-geek with a touch of dorkiness and nerdiness. Nobody would ever categorize me as popular. That'd be stupid to say the least. Although I'd have to say that a lot of people knows me. Probably because of these following reasons:
(1) I talk a LOT. And I like to talk to other people. Even those I don't really know. And plenty of people sees that as a negative thing. So they despise me for it. (And no, I don't really care.)
(2) I'm friendly and I have a lot of friends. So, they introduce me to more and more people. Which in return makes more people know me. (Did that even make sense?)
(3) War freak. Oh yes, I'm a war freak. Not exactly the kind who looks for "wars" all the time. But I'm not the kind who would just let any bad thing that has been said or done to me pass by, either.
(4) A lot of assholes hate me. And because they hate me, of course, they'd know who I am. Bummer.
So yeah. Maybe I'm  the notorious one. Not really the popular type.


Just a thought. Why are there such people who are plastics? You know. The kind who acts and pretends to like you, but deep down they just hate you (or at least dislike you). GET REAL, people. Nobody likes that. I don't like that. As a matter of fact, I abhor that. If you don't like someone, then you don't like them. Period. No need to feign or act so goody-goody and friendly-like around them. Whatever.

So, I have school again tomorrow. Uhhh. I'm starting to hate it. I just can't bear being paranoid all the fucking time. As I've said, it is sucking the life out of me. Which totally sucks. Oh well. Tomorrow's gonna be another day for another bullshit.

Comments

Elaine said…
mabait nman akong friend, di ba? love you!
Victoria said…
Oo naman. Ikaw pa. Abnormal ka eh! Hahaha xD Loveyouusss ♥
Mich said…
ako din love kita. hindi ako kasama dun. sila lang un. parang si CK! hahahaha =))
tagz (forever mobile mode :D ) said…
ok lang un becs.
i really like the fact that u arent plastic. u show to the world who u really are as a person. tao lang. nakakita knb ng isdang bakla? di ba.

kea lang, cguro.. moderation. control. kasi from two negative premises, no valid conclusion must be obtained. *read between the lines.

ok lang yan. ur friends know u. and we know why ur like that. :D
Victoria said…
@Tagz.
Bago ang lahat, NOSE BLEED naman Tagz! Bago yun ah. Hahaha :) At konek naman ng isdang bakla?! Muka ba kong isda? HAHAHA :))

Moderate na nga ko eh. Ano ka ba. Moderate na sa lagay na yan. Hahaha xD Logic talaga. Nakakatanga. Pero yeah, nagets ko :)

Yun naman. Kaya mahal kita eh. Hahaha ♥♥


@Mich.
Hahaha. Love din kita. Ayyy. Lagot ka. Wala pang net si CK eh. Pag nagkaro'n, wawa ka nanaman. Hahaha :DD
Isabelle said…
ngeee... does it really matter if they ignore u.... huh... malas nila... coz they will never have the privilege of knowing someone like bec-bec... hehehe... yaan mo lng ung mga weirdo jan... masabi lng na friends eh noh..hahhaha... =) for sure you'll gain more of them (real friends) as time goes by.. aight becs... til' here...
Victoria said…
Minsan kasi, alam mo yun. Nakakapraning. Hindi mo malaman kung, ayaw ba nila sa'yo o sadyang ganun lang talaga ugali nila. Kaya nga super praning ako. Hahaha :D And what's with BEC-BEC?! Hahaha. Yieee. Sweet. Thanks tiyang :)
tagz said…
ung tungkol sa isda. haha
wala lang un. nabanggit ko lang. kasi tao lng nman ang nagkakamali eh. ung isda hnde. ^^

moderate kna pala. hnd halata eh.hahaha eh kelan lng nman kita nakilala so kala ko kung anu ung nkikita ko sau ngaun, gnun kana even before pa.

ung logic: kung anu ung akala mong ok lang, big deal na pla sa kanila. un lang. 'combine like signs. *math nman. :DD

totoo ung sinabi ni isabel.
oks lang khit ignore ka nila, it only indicates that they arent meant to be ur friend. *pki-check ung grammar nlng. :)

becsislUrve <3
Victoria said…
hahaha. may epal naman kasing isda eh. bakit ba ganun? EPAL. haha :)

yeah. moderate na yan sa lagay na yan. ang tanga naman kasi eh. oo nga naman. lately lang tayo naging close. tingnan mo mga comment nu'ng 'old' friends ko. keme na lang.

haha. nataTATS naman ako sa inyo. love love :p
tagz said…
ewan ko kung bket me isda.
oo nga no. bkit kea. :DD

tats daw. iyak ka ngaaa... :D
Victoria said…
HUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHU :'((((

Masaya ka na? :D
tagz said…
kulang. walang tears. :D
Victoria said…
tangina mo. ayan na nga yung apostrophe (') eh. yun ang luha! bobo, inutil! hahahaha :DDD
tagz said…
tear lang un.
gusto ko tearssSSS
Victoria said…
ay fuck. oh eto.
apostrophe para sa'yo!
''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

hahahaha xD

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